Unplugging Your Inner Critic

Marilyn Orr

When I think about critics I think about the infamous Statler and Waldorf muppet characters. They crack me up. ( Statler and Waldorf wikipedia )

However living with a pair like that would be horrid. It’s one thing to enjoy them in a muppet show, quite another to imagine them following me around judging and criticizing me all the time. 

I grew up with sarcasm. It can really bite. It is meant to be funny but at someone’s expense. Statler and Waldorf have that mastered - they can always find something mean to say about someone. 

As we prepare for our first wellness event at The Cedars Ranch , " Fierce Self-Compassion: Unplug Your Inner Critic " with keynote speaker Dr. Kristin Neff (as announced in the previous blog post ), I am reminded over and over how much our self-talk matters to our wellness. Unplugging our inner critic. So critical! 

Imagine trying to perform on a stage with Statler and Waldorf yelling insults at you! That would be tough. 

How often though do we channel our own version of Waldorf? or Statler? 


What are some of the meanest things your inner critic says to you? Here’s my challenge to you. Catch yourself - capture some of your self-talk (self thinking) and write it down. This may be a bit shocking!  


Before we can unplug that critic we need to find the cord! Embracing self-compassion also means letting go of harsh, nasty self-judging. 

What gives you the right to talk so meanly to yourself? What makes that ok? 

Who else would it be okay to talk to like that? For some of you, how you talk to yourself you would call abusive if you heard someone else being talked to like that! 

If you brought this kind of abusive talk to someone’s attention and they were truly sorry, hadn’t realized what kind of damage and impact they were having, what would you expect next? 

A sincere apology right? Remorseful self-reflection and a sincere desire to apologize and then to never ever treat that person like that again! 

If capturing your self-talk shows you something mean, how about an apology to yourself? How much flourishing could you be doing if you were not living with being judged and talked down to so often? 

So, as we prepare for a new year soon, what about a year filled with more self-compassion and less criticism and judging of ourselves? 

Here is an interesting read on self-judgment: " 5 Reasons to Start Releasing Self-Judgement "

Unplugging your inner critic takes a bit of work. The relief and transformation that comes from replacing criticism with compassion is tremendous! It’s the difference between going home to find a fight going on versus going home to find that someone who loves you has bought you flowers, made you dinner and has their arms wide open to embrace you. 

So here’s to shutting down the critic - unless you are watching an old muppet show! 


We'd love you to join us for our self-compassion event of the year, " Fierce Self-Compassion: Unplug Your Inner Critic ", Saturday April 27th, 2019 at The Cedars Ranch in the Texas Hill Country. Our special one-day event will feature keynote speaker Dr. Kristin Neff , pioneering researcher in self-compassion at the University of Texas. This event is prequalified for CCEUs with the ICF.

Be sure to sign-up to receive access to registration when it becomes available since space will be limited!!

Until next time, 

Marilyn 

Marilyn Orr, MA, CEC, PCC is an Executive and Leadership Coach with Capacity Building Coaching , holding her Professional Certified Coach designation with the International Coach Federation. Marilyn provides professional coaching for executive and business leaders, mentor coaching for coaches, and leadership development support in the form of coaching skills training and soft-skills development. Reach Out to Marilyn for more information.

Marilyn is author of everyday resiliency workbook “ How Absorbent Are Your Shocks? ”, available on Amazon. Subscribe to “ Marilyn’s Musings ” twice monthly blogposts for more leadership and professional development content.

Learn more about our upcoming " Fierce Self-Compassion: Unplug Your Inner Critic " event and sign up today to receive access to updates on this self-compassion event of the year!

By Marilyn Orr 12 Mar, 2020
Really, a Pill for Loneliness?There truly is research going on for this right now. https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2019/jan/26/pill-for-loneliness-psychology-science-medicineIt is not that this isn’t a major problem. It is a huge issue now and trends show it having grown.22% of adults in the USA “always or often” feel lonely.
By Marilyn Orr 30 Jan, 2020
A dear friend of mine said to me once, “you know what I need before I do”.Being sensitive to emotions and subtle language cues is not something I was born doing. In my mid-twenties I was oblivious to my own anger. I mean, really oblivious.
By Marilyn Orr 26 Dec, 2019
Speak to your audience Take a few moments to plan your post Don’t forget to add images Edit carefully before posting You know your audience better than anyone else, so keep them in mind as you write your blog posts. Write about things they care about. If you have a company Facebook page, look here to find topics to write about Once you have a great idea for a post, write the first draft. Some people like to start with the title and then work on the paragraphs. Other people like to start with subtitles and go from there. Choose the method that works for you. Be sure to include a few high-quality images in your blog. Images break up the text and make it more readable. They can also convey emotions or ideas that are hard to put into words. Once you’re happy with the text, put it aside for a day or two, and then re-read it. You’ll probably find a few things you want to add, and a couple more that you want to remove. Have a friend or colleague look it over to make sure there are no mistakes. When your post is error-free, set it up in your blog and publish.
By Marilyn Orr 19 Dec, 2019
Although the potential for a happy holiday is present for many of us there are any number of ways that it can go sideways and be highly stressful.This blog post is for you. The few of you that have an easy holiday ahead, I applaud you and remind you to really appreciate how amazing that is, and likely, how rare.The potential de-railers come in a number of forms: relatives that we find difficult to be around, a lack of control over our own schedule, too much time socializing (if you are more intr...
By Marilyn Orr 21 Nov, 2019
Are you Smarter Than All Your Friends?This is meant to be sassy. Here’s the point. Are you surrounded by people that just appreciate who you are without challenging you or pushing you towards a better you?It is amazing to have people around us that affirm us.
By Marilyn Orr 24 Oct, 2019
In a couple weeks I have the honor of speaking with up to 200 people about advocating for oneself. Finding our voice - not just to speak up for ourself but to create opportunities for advancement, acknowledgement and compensation.This is such an important topic. So many messages get in the way of us promoting ourselves.Self-promotion equals arrogance, is the opposite to humilityI’m not perfect, not the best person for the promotions, etc.I should focus on what I need to work on, focusing on stre...
By Marilyn Orr 12 Mar, 2020
Really, a Pill for Loneliness?There truly is research going on for this right now. https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2019/jan/26/pill-for-loneliness-psychology-science-medicineIt is not that this isn’t a major problem. It is a huge issue now and trends show it having grown.22% of adults in the USA “always or often” feel lonely.
By Marilyn Orr 30 Jan, 2020
A dear friend of mine said to me once, “you know what I need before I do”.Being sensitive to emotions and subtle language cues is not something I was born doing. In my mid-twenties I was oblivious to my own anger. I mean, really oblivious.
Share by: