Blog Posts

Everything listed under: personal growth

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    Uncover Your Blindspots With This Emotional Intelligence Tool

    Blessed blindspots ... We all have them. Those parts of how we see ourself or how we relate to others that just don’t quite line up with how others experience us.These blindspots can cause all kinds of issues for us - from preventing us from getting promoted to stress in our closest relationships.There are many ways to uncover these blindspots - ask your partner what you do that’s annoying, complete a 360 evaluation or simply have kids and wait until they are teenagers, they will tell you, for s...  Read More...

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    Resiliency in Action

    The American Psychological Association gives this definition of resilience:"The ability to adapt well to adversity, trauma, tragedy, threats, and even significant sources of stress.”If life didn’t come with lots of stress we wouldn’t need to focus on resilience so often.Since there is no shortage of stress, never mind adversity and trauma, we need to be actively engaged in increasing the behaviors, the thinking and the emotions that support us being able to bounce back to full functioning.If you...  Read More...

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    Stretching Beyond Your Comfort Zone

    As I write this I’m about to be the attendee at a conference that is in a related field but not my official field of coaching.So?It has me feeling two things that I think are worth contemplating.First, as an extrovert I’m excited to meet hundreds of strangers. Enjoying that aspect of this may not apply to you. However, getting to hang out with people that are not our normal “tribe” allows us to hear new ideas, see the world from a different perspective and gain new skills...  Read More...

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    How To Start Your Year With Intention

    Resolutions that stick are accompanied by appropriate goals and actions. So, let’s just jump to the specifics. Today’s blog post is simply an outline you can use to be really intentional about your 2019. Enjoy! (As a bonus to yourself, you can set a reminder for yourself every few months to encourage yourself to stay with your goals!) Relationships:1.   Read More...

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    Increasing Emotional Resiliency

    In the coaching world we talk about “self mastery”. I see it as the foundational work we need for ongoing resiliency. That ability to bounce back and even thrive during or after difficult times and situations is made up of multiple skills, habits and beliefs.   Read More...

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    Strong Women Make Waves

    One of my dearest friends gave me a present this year for my birthday. I love it. Many of my closest friends are strong women. Most of my coaching clients are strong female executives. So? Well, I want to write today’s blog to them but also to the people who live with them, work with them, watch them.   Read More...

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    Breaking the Habit of Self-Sabotage

    Today's "Marilyn's Musings" blog post is written by guest blogger, Susan Hemmings:Who’s In For the Ride?In the past summer I went to Canada’s Wonderland with my brother and nephew. We love the rides and I wanted to enjoy the thrill of the speed and excitement of being in zero gravity! I love rollercoasters and Leviathan is one of the biggest coasters in the world.   Read More...

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    Being Your Own Best Support

    So often when we are around people who irritate us we use the wrong strategies to deal with it. Sometimes we mis-diagnose what is underlying their behavior. Sometimes we react with our own blindspots. Different things will push your buttons than push mine but underneath those irritations are often the same core issues.   Read More...

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    Personal Growth Through Self-Assessment

    We all know what it’s like to be around people who are constantly trying to impress you so that both you and they can think they are all that and a bag of chips. Not fun.Is there a difficult side to people who don’t think highly enough of themselves? Do we just call this humility?On either end of this spectrum the distortion and inaccuracy causes issues both for the individual with the distorted self-concept and for those around them.The individual who doesn’t know their strengths can mistakenly...  Read More...

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    Benefits of Diversity

    When I was eighteen months old I moved to live in a new country. Belgium. Not long later I was living in Germany.   Read More...

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    Narcissism: What It Means & How To Live With It

    It is highly likely that you have heard the word narcissist in the last month or so. Well, now you have!This word and concept are seemingly much more talked about than before and I think with good reason. Wikipedia presents indicators that it has increased in our current North American culture.   Read More...

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    Developing Personal Flexibility

    Just as there are many facets to emotional intelligence, so there are to resiliency. One key skill that contributes to both is flexibility.We all have an initial reaction to the word. I think of people who don’t need life to be rigid.   Read More...

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    5 Ways To Support Others’ Dreams

    On December 30th we received a new family member - such a great sign of new beginnings.New life. All hopes and dreams lie ahead. Full of possibility.There is nothing right now to get in the way of little David dreaming and creating the future he will end up wanting for himself.What gets in the way of us chasing our dreams?   Read More...

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    Communicating Without Assumptions

    My rug and my cabinet exterior are both made from recycled soda bottles. Many of my choices are fueled by my desire to live more environmentally friendly.So?So, when I was shopping last week and the lady after me in line at the grocery store got my attention to say “You know, it’s a small thing but you really should be using cloth bags!” it really pushed my buttons!I felt a compulsion to explain, justify, make her realize that she had no idea who she was saying that to.Of course I use cloth bags...  Read More...

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    Why 2 Thanksgivings Aren’t Enough!

    Being a Canadian living in the States I get 2 Thanksgivings. Life is good! (I don’t even eat turkey :) )As Bill and I create our dream together we have so much to be grateful for.   Read More...

  • Increasing Your Self-Awareness

    “He who knows others is wise; he who knows himself is enlightened.”― Lao TzuLately I’ve had the pleasure of having conversations with both family members and friends about their Myers-Briggs or StrengthsFinder results. The use of assessments is not the only way to increase one’s self-awareness but it’s a fun one!Partly the assessment gives you time to reflect and agree or disagree with statements in the tool about you.These kinds of tools can be used well and bring a lot of understanding and acc...  Read More...

  • The Blame Game

    There are key ingredients, traits, outlooks, that enable some people to grow from feedback and personal insight and others to regress.You know some of the people that regress - they get defensive when someone points out something. They are experts at pointing the finger at multiple other people and circumstances to explain why it is not their fault. They always have a reason for why things went wrong and that reason is never their own mistake or shortcoming.You don’t have to be very old to...  Read More...

  • Tools for Difficult Conversations

    This week I’m getting to speak in Wimberley. The Chamber of Commerce is having it’s first ever small business week with a day of seminars and a day of exhibitions. The topic is difficult conversation tools so let’s chat about that that today.As I prepared for the 1-hour workshop, I started by listing what does make conversations and conflict difficult at times:Old pain and old stories that get triggeredMaking the current conflict about way bigger themes instead of what is currentGetting defensiv...  Read More...

  • Facing Fear in Texas Y'all!

    When it comes to fear in some ways I’m very fearless and in others I’m a scaredy cat. One of the highest ranked fears - public speaking - I quite enjoy. I don’t like having needles but they don’t really bother me.   Read More...

  • From Manipulation to Authenticity

    As promised (last week), today I want to focus on offering ideas for those of you who see this pattern in yourself but want to grow.Here is the tricky part. Manipulation often gets people what they think they want. It reinforces itself.If I don’t want to feel pain and by lying I avoid the pain then I’m likely to try that again.If I want you to feel bad for me and do something nice for me and that works then I’m likely going to use that perspective of myself as a victim again.The patterns around ...  Read More...