Express Vs. Impress

Express Vs. Impress

As much as we may want to not care what other people think of us, most of us are not entirely free from this annoying concern.

For some people the concern over what people think of them rules their lives and controls their daily choices. It truly is a stifling way to live. In whatever way we adjust in order to present in acceptable ways to others, we compromise our true selves. 

“You can't base your life on other people's expectations.” - Stevie Wonder 

Lovely thought but how do we stop caring what other people think?

Two parts are critical to this transition. Firstly, actually caring more about what we ourselves think about our own opinions, feelings and thoughts. Honoring who we are is critical. Sometimes we will be the only person who likes our opinion. That's okay. Your own opinion of yourself really does matter.

Secondly, we need to put in to perspective the opinions of others. If indeed the other person is healthy emotionally, has our best interest at heart, is not shaming or judging us and comes from a place of love, then we may benefit from letting their opinion carry weight.

Far too often we let the opinions of others matter when they are actually judging us, criticizing us, making their acceptance of us conditional and being truly self-centered versus simply loving.

In reality some people actually consistently encourage a desire for approval from others through praise or through shaming. (This is likely coming out of their own need for approval and power.) If you find yourself especially wanting to impress certain people it is worth paying attention to their behaviors. It may not just be your issue of wanting to please!

“Getstrongbro” has some excellent points in this entertaining short video. 

The point that stands out the most to me is his advice to focus on expressing versus impressing. 

It’s a huge shift in thinking. Instead of tailoring your words to win approval by others, focus on your words being a gift to you in giving voice to your thoughts, ideas, emotions, etc. The gift is to yourself. Others may or may not agree but the goal is expression of what you want to say. That goal is in your control.

The reaction by others to our ideas is not in our control. Releasing the need to try and control other people’s reactions is amazingly freeing.


What music could you be dancing to now if you didn't care that others can't hear the music?


Marilyn Orr, MA, CEC, PCC is an Executive and Leadership Coach with Capacity Building Coaching, holding her Professional Certified Coach designation with the International Coach Federation.

Marilyn provides professional coaching for executive and business leaders, mentor coaching for coaches, and leadership development support in the form of coaching skills training and soft-skills development.

Marilyn is author of everyday resiliency workbook “How Absorbent Are Your Shocks?”, available on Amazon. Subscribe to “Marilyn’s Musings” twice monthly blogposts for more leadership and professional development content.

32 comments (Add your own)

1. wrote:
I think this is one of the most significant information for me.
And i'm glad reading your article. But wanna remark on few general things, The site style is
perfect, the articles is really great : D. Good job, cheers

Fri, May 3, 2019 @ 8:25 AM

2. wrote:
Hello there, just became aware of your blog through Google, and
found that it's really informative. I am gonna watch out for brussels.
I'll appreciate if you continue this in future. A lot of people will
be benefited from your writing. Cheers!

Sun, May 12, 2019 @ 7:34 AM

3. wrote:
I think this is among the most vital info for me.

And i'm satisfied studying your article. But should observation on some basic things, The site taste is wonderful,
the articles is really great : D. Good task, cheers

Sun, May 12, 2019 @ 10:06 AM

4. wrote:
Great site you have got here.. It's hard to find good quality writing like yours nowadays.
I seriously appreciate people like you! Take care!!

Wed, May 15, 2019 @ 7:05 PM

5. wrote:
Amazing blog! Is your theme custom made or did you download it from somewhere?

A theme like yours with a few simple adjustements would really make my blog
jump out. Please let me know where you got your theme.
Thank you

Thu, May 16, 2019 @ 6:59 PM

6. wrote:
It's perfect time to make some plans for the future and it is time to be happy.

I've read this post and if I could I desire to suggest you few interesting things or advice.
Maybe you could write next articles referring to this article.
I desire to read even more things about it!

Mon, June 10, 2019 @ 8:41 AM

7. wrote:
Undeniably believe that which you stated. Your favorite justification appeared
to be on the internet the simplest thing to be aware
of. I say to you, I certainly get irked while people consider
worries that they just don't know about. You managed to hit the nail upon the top
and defined out the whole thing without having side-effects ,
people can take a signal. Will probably be back to get more.


Wed, June 12, 2019 @ 5:23 AM

8. wrote:
I just couldn't leave your website before suggesting that
I really loved the usual info a person provide for your guests?
Is gonna be again ceaselessly to inspect new posts

Fri, June 21, 2019 @ 6:30 PM

9. wrote:
Link exchange is nothing else except it is simply placing the other person's weblog link on your page at appropriate place and
other person will also do similar in support of you.
natalielise pof

Wed, July 24, 2019 @ 10:10 AM

10. wrote:
It's very straightforward to find out any topic on web as compared to books, as I found this post at this website.

Tue, July 30, 2019 @ 8:38 AM

11. wrote:
Incredible points. Great arguments. Keep up the good effort.

Fri, August 23, 2019 @ 9:58 AM

12. wrote:
What's up, all is going perfectly here and ofcourse every one
is sharing data, that's actually fine, keep up writing.

Sat, September 7, 2019 @ 9:14 AM

13. wrote:
With havin so much content and articles do you ever run into any problems
of plagorism or copyright infringement? My site has a lot of exclusive content I've either written myself or outsourced but it
looks like a lot of it is popping it up all over the internet without my authorization. Do you
know any methods to help protect against content
from being ripped off? I'd genuinely appreciate it.

Wed, September 18, 2019 @ 3:14 PM

14. wrote:
I think this is among the most significant information for me.

And i am glad reading your article. But wanna remark on few general things, The web
site style is wonderful, the articles is really nice :
D. Good job, cheers

Fri, September 20, 2019 @ 11:38 PM

15. wrote:
Hi everyone, it's my first pay a quick visit at this website, and paragraph is actually
fruitful designed for me, keep up posting these posts.

Wed, September 25, 2019 @ 3:32 PM

16. wrote:
It's impressive that you are getting thoughts from this piece of
writing as well as from our dialogue made at this time.

Tue, October 29, 2019 @ 1:25 AM

17. wrote:
Since the admin of this site is working, no hesitation very soon it will be well-known,
due to its feature contents.

Tue, November 5, 2019 @ 8:16 AM

18. wrote:
I visited many web pages but the audio feature for audio songs current
at this web site is truly superb.

Sat, November 23, 2019 @ 7:36 PM

19. wrote:
Hi to all, it's actually a good for me to visit this website, it includes precious Information.

Tue, November 26, 2019 @ 1:39 AM

20. wrote:
I am genuinely grateful to the owner of this web site who has shared
this impressive paragraph at at this time.

Sun, December 1, 2019 @ 11:42 PM

21. wrote:
Hmm is anyone else encountering problems with the images on this blog loading?
I'm trying to find out if its a problem on my end or
if it's the blog. Any responses would be greatly appreciated.

Mon, December 2, 2019 @ 8:45 AM

22. wrote:
I really like your blog.. very nice colors & theme. Did you create this website yourself or
did you hire someone to do it for you? Plz reply as I'm looking to create
my own blog and would like to find out where u got this
from. kudos

Sun, December 8, 2019 @ 1:35 PM

23. wrote:
Normally I do not read article on blogs, but
I would like to say that this write-up very pressured me
to try and do it! Your writing style has been surprised me.
Thank you, quite great post.

Tue, December 10, 2019 @ 8:26 AM

24. wrote:
Heya i'm for the primary time here. I found this board and I to find It truly useful &
it helped me out much. I am hoping to present something back and aid others
like you helped me.

Wed, December 11, 2019 @ 8:56 AM

25. wrote:
Excellent way of telling, and nice piece of writing to obtain data on the topic of my presentation subject matter, which i am going to deliver in school.

Thu, December 12, 2019 @ 4:15 AM

26. wrote:
I am really loving the theme/design of your website. Do you ever run into any web browser
compatibility issues? A few of my blog audience have complained about my website not
operating correctly in Explorer but looks great in Firefox.
Do you have any solutions to help fix this issue?

Sun, December 15, 2019 @ 11:05 PM

27. wrote:
This post provides clear idea for the new viewers of blogging, that genuinely how
to do running a blog.

Mon, December 16, 2019 @ 7:07 AM

28. wrote:
This design is spectacular! You obviously know how to keep a
reader entertained. Between your wit and your
videos, I was almost moved to start my own blog (well, almost...HaHa!) Great job.
I really loved what you had to say, and more than that,
how you presented it. Too cool!

Tue, December 24, 2019 @ 2:21 AM

29. wrote:
A fascinating discussion is definitely worth comment.
I do believe that you ought to write more on this topic, it
may not be a taboo matter but usually folks don't talk about these issues.
To the next! Best wishes!!

Thu, January 2, 2020 @ 6:44 AM

30. wrote:
I know this if off topic but I'm looking into starting my own blog and was curious what all is needed to get
set up? I'm assuming having a blog like yours would cost a pretty
penny? I'm not very internet smart so I'm not 100% positive.
Any tips or advice would be greatly appreciated. Cheers

Tue, January 7, 2020 @ 5:24 AM

31. wrote:
obviously like your web site but you have to check the spelling
on quite a few of your posts. Many of them are rife with spelling issues and I in finding it very troublesome to tell the truth on the other hand I will surely come back again.

Tue, January 14, 2020 @ 4:20 AM

32. wrote:
Hello! This post could not be written any better!
Reading through this post reminds me of my previous room
mate! He always kept talking about this. I will forward this post to him.
Fairly certain he will have a good read. Thanks for sharing!

Sun, February 16, 2020 @ 12:09 AM

Add a New Comment


Comment Guidelines: No HTML is allowed. Off-topic or inappropriate comments will be edited or deleted. Thanks.

Events Calendar