Endings are always around us but they have been especially obvious to me lately.
In November my father-in-law died at the amazing age of 94. An ending a journey that started in 1921, the year the first Band-Aid hit the market, the first lie detector was invented, the term “robot” was coined for the first time although not yet actually invented. “Between 1921 and 1930, Walther Bothe built his coincidence circuit -- an electronic device that foretold the building blocks for the first computers (and) the first Radio Shack store opened in 1921.” (http://www.wired.com/2012/11/the-decades-that-invented-the-future-part-3-1921-1930/)
Over the past couple of weeks Bill and I have watched, painfully, as the previous owner to our land has worked on sorting, moving and grieving. She had dreams for the property that is now destined to be “The Cedars”. Walking away and starting fresh somewhere is a gift but it also means accepting the fact that a dream has died or finished.
What do you need to walk away from (or perhaps run from) in 2016 that is not serving you well anymore? What things were once life-giving but now have become unhealthy? As we grow and mature we are also able to see things more clearly and may see toxic patterns in habits or relationships that we once thought were just fine.
How do we end well? I think that raising our awareness around both the emotions and the thoughts connected to a situation let us transition much more effectively and thoroughly.
Let’s get practical. Making lists is a great place to start, especially for those of you who lean towards “thinking” over “feeling”.
- What had I hoped for X (relationship, dream, move, job …) to be?
- What gifts did I get from X?
- What were (are) the disappointments?
- What am I making room for in my life when I let go of X?
- What unfinished business do I need to attend to in order to be free to move on?
- What new and more accurate conclusions do I want to draw about myself, the world, etc.?
If you find the thinking part easier, I encourage you to pause in order to feel.
If you find the feeling easier, I encourage you to examine your thoughts as well.
I love this quote regarding lesson planning:
What would great closure look like for you on a couple of key things as you move in to 2016?
What are the lessons you have learned in 2015?
Posted on Tue, December 22, 2015
by Marilyn Orr filed under